its the sudden turn of events that throws everyone off. soon, november will grace us, and with her comes dark nights, dark mornings, dark days, and cold winds. family dinners, friend dinners, signs of snow, frosted roads. turkeys and ducks and stuffing and cranberries. the desire of camraderie, prolonged hot showers, early to sleep, late to rise. hearty meals, football sundays. i’ve had a marvelous two days, full of afternoon naps and salary raises. tomorrow promises a champagne cake and a viewing of the tempest and chocolat. friday brings double yoga sessions, no class, and work. for the first time in a while today, i giggled. i laugh a lot anyway, that’s not rare. but someone made me giggle. the sort where you blush afterward, mumble some sort of awkward nothing and leave before they realize what just happened. he made me giggle. i’m going to try and not do that anymore, or else it’d be too obvious? i can’t wait to crunch the leaves on sunday evening, and to see rocky horror on saturday. graveyard cupcakes for my little cousins, a maximum of three hours homework over the course of three days. entirely do-able. catching up on all the sleep i’ve lost. cleaning and hopefully having fun? though i know not with who yet. sunday… scary movies? possibly guests? though they haven’t been picked. i need coffee. i slept for 4 hours this afternoon. i want to sleep now. but i’m so comfortable listening to records, editing photos, and wondering why he made me giggle. now i just feel awkward. as awkward as i felt when i showed up on campus soaking wet, and after i almost got hit by two cars. oh me, oh my. isn’t this fantastic?
In spring of youth it was my lot
To haunt of the wide world a spot
The which I could not love the less-
So lovely was the loneliness
Of a wild lake, with black rock bound,
And the tall pines that towered around.
But when the Night had thrown her pall
Upon that spot, as upon all,
And the mystic wind went by
Murmuring in melody-
Then- ah then I would awake
To the terror of the lone lake.
thank edgar allen poe for his brilliance and perfection at bringing that forboding autumn ambiance to the table.
i need to try and not be so awkward. i think my approach is a bit backwards in the sense that when he waves, i stare. i’ve never been good at this but now’s the time where i suppose i can improve. i’d typically turn to cake or poetry in lieu of proper conversation, but i realize that proper conversation is something incredibly important. maybe some luck will come my way.