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veritas (memoriam teneo)

7/5/71-6/28/09

good sunday to you! it’s been a good time since i did a typical sunday post.Β  so here, in good time, is the normal type thing, i did present to you at one point, and i think there is a mixed tape included too!

past week has been interesting, and overall, it’s been okay.Β  i had MEAD yesterday and i’m glad its over.Β  school was demanding- essays due daily, and rewrites were evidentΒ  thus making me tired.Β  i almost bought my tickets to timber timbre and dark dark dark- but i didn’t.Β  i didn’t work either. but this week is more habitual, or at least i hope.Β  meredith arrives friday! that is just lovely, and our mixed tape party is on sunday! i’m quite looking forward to that.Β  but in other news- its been 8 months since my father passed away (as of today), he passed away, SUNDAY, June 28th, 2009 while I was babysitting, and tonight, that’s exactly what I am doing- babysitting.Β  it’s ironic in that way.Β  i have been trying not to think of it too much, mainly because i don’t want to get emotional.Β  i was never really given the opportunity to know my father, and of course now, because I never will get to, I want to.Β  Deep down, I know that if he still were alive, we’d still be somewhat estranged.Β  For the pure sake of staying true, I can say for certain that I miss the feeling of actually havinganother parent out there.Β  And yes, I do miss him, but I never knew him, so its hard to say “I miss him,” when in fact, I knew him not.Β  Oh its so hard to put this sort of thing into words- also for lack of a better way to put it, even if I knew the words to use, I wouldn’t.Β  I haven’t discussed this much since it happened, and on top of that, I don’t know who I’d discuss it with.Β  I want him to be at peace, and not just him, but the rest of my famiy too.Β  RIP dad.

enfin

post script: mixed tape will be posted tonight!

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